I was pruning the auld emails, and came across a beauty contact I hadn’t contacted, and then proceeded to fall down a rabbit hole of ayurvedic medicine.

What’s it all about?

I don’t know!

The brand is Pukka, and I mean, that’s its name, it’s not being used in the adjectival sense that Jamie Oliver popularised* {ugh.} They’ve got, amongst many other products, three lines of skincare that are geared for each of the three doshas, Vata, Pitta and Kapha, which are embodied by three different mind/body types, which in turn require three different approaches to lifestyle and well being.

And there’s a quiz on the site! So you can figure out your dosha! I love a good quiz! Except, I’ve been doing magazine quizzes since I was about eight, so the outcomes are never really that much of a surprise. Even when I lie a little, it always ends up the way I think it’s going to. Which may be a self-fulfilling prophecy, but seriously, you know from the first question that you’re going to be mostly As or whatever.

Quiz makers: mix it up, for God’s sake!

So, off I went to take the quiz. First, I had to trawl for it it, which was annoying — if they’re going to sell me a bunch of stuff, based on  my dosha, which I need to figure out, the quiz itself ought to be the easiest thing to find. It is under the Ayurvedic Roots tab.

First question!

Body frame

Thin, Irregular, Prominent bones

Medium, Balanced

Large, Solid

Right. I can see where this is going.

The quiz is short, sweet, and nope, no surprises. I am a Kapha, which I reckoned because all the answers on the first screen were in order. Basically, Vata-Pitta-Kapha = small-medium-large.

There were no judgements made, which is nice, and each dosha has its own dietary requirements. The Kapha ones make me sad, even though I have unwittingly begun to follow the directives laid down: I’ve stopped eating pork, and I don’t eat much yoghurt, but no eggs, cheese or rice? Or avocados? Or sweet potatoes or cucumbers? Or nuts? Somebody call the waaaaaaabulance.

Well, I’m off to go learn what the ayurvedic thing is all about. Namaste!

*The word actually does have meaning, it’s not a makey-uppy thing. It is Hindu for authentic.