It is with great relief and disproportionate joy that I removed my first week’s worth of the Dr Lewinn Renunail Nail Strengthener treatment. Not that it has been bad, not by any means! It’s merely that in the last two days, my nails, which need no help in the looking-manky department, have really started looking crusty.

Now, they are clean and clear, and ready to rest. I’ve cut them all down to the bare minimum length, and will continue to bathe them in Renunail Nourishing Oil.

Actually, I have been lazy about the oil — and so if this programme doesn’t work, I can’t exactly blame the product, can I?!?

My cuticles are still peeling like bananas in a monkey cartoon. Actually, I think they are hangnails? Is that really a term, or did my mum make that up?

So: One week off, back to the nail strengthener for another week, one other week off, and the third and final week. I will have perfect fingernails by the end of June!