SOAP & GLORY

Festive ’14: A Boots Miscellany

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‘Miscellany’ sounds so… miscellaneous, but I mean it in the best possible sense, because where else can you go to find a whole bunch of stuff that is beautifully packaged and priced for every level of necessity?
SOAP MOLTON L'OREAL

From left: Soap & Glory Kiss Much, €6.50, a lovely lip balm that comes in a bauble; speaking of baubles, Molton Brown’s offering is filled with Black Pepper soap, €12; and L’Oreal Professional’s Christmas Cracker Absolut Repair Lipidium, €8.49 has healthy sized samples of the hair treats inside.

I could have gone on and on — there is so much in Boots, including their own No 7 line, I could wander all daydreamy amidst their aisles for hours. Shopping for others, of course! {Uh huh.}

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Tanning Twenty Twelve: Tired of It {Soap & Glory Glow Getter}

/ MANY BRAVE FOOLS / 2 Comments

How much work can it be, this tanning? It’s not like digging ditches, I mean, come on. But there is a mental tiredness I am experiencing that is pretty comprehensive, and makes me think I’d rather go pick up a shovel. There is actually a lot of thought that goes into this caper: making sure I’ve exfoliated, because sometimes I can’t be bothered; making sure that I am all moisturised and whatever; and most of all, get my head round the particular qualities of the tan involved.

Glow Getter by Soap & Glory is a Face & Body Sun Powder Spray. Okay, ‘spray’ — already an issue for me, because of the mess. ‘Powder’? Wha’?

I couldn’t get my head round it, and so I kept putting off putting it on.

I gave it a go the other day and I am so confused.

It is awkward. You can’t spray it on a mitt and manage to spread it around as well as you would a mousse or a gel or a liquid. So I had to spray it directly onto the bod. Which resulted in splotches of powdery {it really is a powder!} patches, because I didn’t want to hold the can too far away because the spray would get all over the place.

Too splotchy, though, spraying up close, so I got into the shower — my white, pristine shower — and tried again. It wasn’t much better, to be honest.

I used my mitt to spread the tan around, and was just effing and blinding the entire time. This is a pain in the arse was the prevailing theme.

In about two minutes, though? Pretty feckin’ lovely colour. Extremely warm and … posh. This was instantaneous poshness. I looked like, if my life was Inception, I’d put on some fancy dress and when I walked out my door I’d be stepping onto the Riviera.

Confusion! It is the messiest tan I have ever used, probably down to the powder element — but it is also like the kind of tan you get when you have nothing else to do but lie around on a lounger on the deck of a yacht. {I am guessing. I would very much like to find that out in practice.}

My conclusion: I will take this with me on holiday to a place that has a bathroom that I don’t have to clean myself. Otherwise? Too much like work.

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€14/£10.50

Also! The next morning in the shower, the colour just rolled right down the drain. Just so you know.

What I Did Yesterday *or* All the Stuff I Put On Myself

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I’ve been going round barefaced most of the week, and yesterday it felt like I was wearing all the make-up in the world.

I blame the mascara.

Well, it is not the mascara’s fault. In fact, the mascara is pretty spectac: Clinique High Impact Extreme Volume Mascara in Intense Black. They’ve changed the wand into one of those spiky applicators, and it seems to be twice as long as most spiky applicators. I forgot to put this on my list yesterday because I forgot I had it.

I was never a fan of the Clinique mascara, but this one has changed my mind, even though I went abso crazy and layered on a million tonnes of it. Look how fake the lashes look, though, without having to mess with glue and tweezers!

Also on view is Clarins 3-Dot Liner, with which I did an okay job. The applicator brush is kind of like it is cut into three points, and you just dot it on. The theory is that this is easier than trying to draw a perfect line. In practice? Yeah, easier, and a good result. I recommend using a hand mirror, because I didn’t, and I seem to remember the inimitable Claude Defresne, Clarins’ make up artist, saying to use one. It’s easier to bring the mirror closer to your eye, rather than the eye closer to the mirror.

Lips: NYC Smooch Proof 16H Lip Stain in Berry Long Time. Eh. There’s a difference between matte and flatte, and this was very flatte, and drying. This experience of NYC lip colour was saved by a layer of NYC Kiss Gloss in Sugar Hill Shimmer, as shown. It is very shiny — and fruity! That was fun.

Hang on, what else — OMG. The Glitter. I was like a walking glitter machine yesterday. I apologise to all the people I met, whose hands I shook, and wow, people I hugged? Sorry! The kisses on the cheeks? Mea culpa!

Because I was covvvvvvered in shiny little bits and I am sure that I spread them around like a luminescent plague.

The Eau Sublime Or from Roger & Gallet was not that bad, actually, so the hand-shakers probably got off easy. It is full of sparkle, and completely perfect for highlighting decolletage and bare shoulders. Super sexy, if not super scented. Didn’t get much of an impression off of the body cream, but that was because I mistakenly put on the Glow Getter: Face & Body Sun Powder Spray from Soap & Glory, which is going to get a post all its own, because hoo boy, what a imperfectly perfect product.

So, body aglow, and hey! here’s some stuff for my face. I dispensed a tiny bit of Uplight: Face Luminizer Gel from Make Up Forever and applied it — and almost started screaming, because holy wow, the amount of glitter that is in that stuff is like … it was like a frollick of fairies had farted on my face.

Now, seriously: a day without shimmer is a day wasted, but this was ridic. I had put on some Lancôme Flash Bronzer Face Gel and didn’t want to wash it off and start over, I was pressed for time — and feck it, I said I would wear this stuff, so wear it I would. I scraped off as much as I could and proceeded to try to dull it down with some bronzer.

I don’t think it was noticeable, but again, I do apologise to anyone that got glittered.

Here’s the line up:

It’s that last one on the right you’ve got watch out for…

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Glow Getter not pictured because I am still processing its effects.

What I’m Going To Do Today

/ brightandbeautyfull / 1 Comment

Because it is soooo interesting.

No really, I have a lot of stuff to slap on the bod and the gob, and since I am going in to town, I have an reason to get all gussied up.

Also: Going In To Town has become kind of a big deal, because I don’t really need to Go in order to forage for anything anymore, not food, not shoes, not books, so it feels a bit like a staycation.

So:

Just this very morning, the postman brought be Eau Sublime Or and Crème Sublime Or, from Roger & Gallet. Both are shimmery!

I’ve got this stuff called Glow Getter: Face & Body Sun Powder Spray from Soap & Glory that makes me nervous, A} because I hate spraying stuff in the bath and B} powder spray? Like the stuff you spray on your smelly feet? That stuff is a mess.

What else? I got a bunch of NYC Smooch Proof 16H Lip Stain in, so I think I’ll give the Berry Long Time a lash.

I’ve got this Make Up Forever Uplight: Face Luminizer Gel that’s been sitting on my desk… I don’t know, I tried a bit on that back of my hand, as you do, and I don’t think I did it right. I may have to find a tutorial. I think if one messes this up, one looks like an eejit with crazy, shiny pink stuff all over one’s face.

Also! Very, very excited to try Clarin’s 3-Dot Liner, which the brand’s make up artist, Claude Defresne called ‘eyeliner for dummies’ in his lovely French accent. *Sigh*

I better get crackin’. You will probs be seeing me from my usually spot in the back of the 46A…