Look. At. That.

Before I go any further, okay: it costs a grand. That would be One Large in The Wire-speak. But! If you have many siblings, or close cousins, and you all want to club in together, depending on how many you are, it could cost you only €100 to get your parents, or your parents + aunt & uncle, this massive, flippin’ amazing hamper.

Look at it! There are eleven bottles in it, and I am not talking bottles of spring water. Bollinger Champagne! Jameson! Red and white wine, and port, and creme liqueur!

Coffee, tea, jam, cakes, choccies, cheeses, biscuits for cheese, nuts, decorations! Christmas crackers, relish, mustard, dressings, Fancy Serviettes — a Fancy Serviette holder! I could go on and on, because I adore this thing, this inanimate object. An inanimate object, that in fairness, is animating me beyond all sense.

Plus: THE HAMPER ITSELF with which you can go somewhere pastoral and pretend that you are in an episode of Downton Abbey. OMGGGGG.

What is that little tin, bottom right, the one that looks like a wee suitcase? I love it. {I suspect it is the Walker’s Shortbread Fingers.}

I love everything here, unconditionally, and with the whole of my heart.

So, yeah, I know, €1000, but seriously, embark upon my plan and you cannot fail. And there is enough to share out, frankly, amongst three pairs of parent-y/aunt’n’uncley adults, the ones who always so hard to buy for, you just have to legislate for who gets the hamper, which could get ugly — but if you bring it forward as your idea, I’d say that’s all the argument you need.

The hamper is, essentially, your intellectual property. You can tell ’em I said so. {However, I am not available to mediate any negotiations. Nor would you want to hire me, because my fee would be the hamper. Bwahahahaha.}

***

Hampers & Co interactive brochure is here. I could ‘leaf’ through it all day long.