When Worlds Collide

In my review of REN’s Guérande Salt Exfoliating Body Balm, I mentioned that I was a featured columnist in the upcoming Irish Tatler.

Well, as I was waiting in the salubrious environs of Therese R Wellbeing and Beauty’s Sanctuary Salon yesterday, ahead of my Voya eye treatment, I found that the issue is not upcoming, it is here!

The piece is about whether or not beauty is only for the young, to which I responded, ‘Uh, no’. I’ve never felt better about myself, and my age advances every year, funnily enough.

The issue looked great — well, what I could make out without my reading glasses…

Okay, Two Words: Hydrotherm Mattress

HYDROTHERM MATTRESS.

So, up I got, onto one of the massage beds in Therese R Wellness and Beauty, in the Rochestown Lodge Hotel, preparatory to receiving Voya‘s latest treatment, and holy wow: the plinth was warm and it was moving.

‘What is this?’ I gasped, and my consultant replied, ‘It’s a hydrotherm mattress.’

A hydrotherm mattress. A mattress that is filled with water that is warm. So you lay there, and whilst your face and decolleté are getting their treat, your whole entire back is warm and floaty.

I will write more after the weekend about the treatment itself, which uses the Irish brand’s Bright Eyes cream, and involves lymphatic massage and seaweed eye patches, but wow, seriously: the HYDROTHERM MATTRESS*.

*Clearly, I have a thing for therapeutic furniture: I waxed lyrical about Zeba Hairdressing’s massage chairs only t’other day. Also, click the link for info regarding their fundraising event this Sunday!

Haiku Review: REN Guérande Salt Exfoliating Body Balm

I applied this dry.
I dislike dry salt scrubbing.
Or do I?!? Let’s see…

I’m a featured columnist in the upcoming issue of Irish Tatler, and when asked for my latest beauty secret, I wrote: ‘Read the directions!’ Because I hardly ever do, and it has lead to some near misses. like thinking that the hair exfoliant was a styling product, for example, and wondering why it was so gritty. Luckily, I am not so thick as to have put, I don’t know, hemorrhoid cream on my toothbrush, but I tend to take products at label-value. If it says something about hair on it, and it’s in a tube, well, it’s styling product, right? Right?!?!

It’s a first world problem to do with mouse type. I swear, doing this job has ruined my eyesight, because of all the four point type I’ve had to read over the years. Since I didn’t bother with me specs when I decided to test REN’s Guérande Salt Exfoliating Body Balm, I squinted and saw that the recommended application was to a dry body avant le douche.

I prepared to do so, grumbling, because stupid salt scrubs are always so crumbly, and half of it goes down the drain, or is all over the floor, because I can’t get into the shower and then turn on the water, because the first blast is always frickin’ ice cold, and ugh what a drag… But the result was totally worth it, and the salt-ness of it is actually contained in a balm, which goes on smoothly, and not a grain is wasted. Huh.

I suppose I should amend my exhortation: read the directions completely. And maybe the label.

One day I actually read the label in its entirety— because I was wearing my glasses — and saw that you could also use this on a damp bod, if you wanted a gentler exfoliating experience. And so I did, and you know what? I prefer the dry brush effect! Not that this wasn’t as effective when wet, but I do prefer a bit of rough when it comes to exfoliation {…} and you get a double-scrub effect: you scrub it on dry, you scrub it off wet — it feels remarkably thorough for a home treatment, and the result is really soft, sweet smelling skin.

Yeah, so, I would have known better, and saved myself some gurning, but there you go. Happy enough to use it as it is intended after all.

€24 (available on cloud10beauty.com)/£20

Speaking of Hair: Zeba Salon Fundraising Event

When am I not speaking about hair?

I had an amazing session at Zeba Hairdressing in South William Street, and it wasn’t all about me getting a beautiful cut and new highlights — although, of course, I have to be able to say with conviction that the services provided are top notch, right? Well, they are, and what’s more, the stylists and colourists at the salon are not only good with their hands, they are good with their hearts.

On Sunday, 15 April, Zeba are hosting a ‘Treat Yourself and Help the Children’ fundraising day in aid of Temple Street Children’s University Hospital, with proceeds going to the Cleft Lip & Palate Department. Owners Paul and Angie Drumgoole have a particular attachment to this department, as it has provided necessary, and exemplary, care for their youngest son Christian, who was born with a cleft palate.

All proceeds from the day go to the hospital, and all staff at work during the 11 am to 5pm time slot are working for free.

Treatments on offer are:
>A cut and blowdry for €50
>Colour, cut and blowdry for just €100
>Highlights and a cut and blowdry for €150
>Nail treatments in the salon on the day for €10.

And you get a  L’Oreal goody bag to take home with you. Bonus!

The salon is top-grade, and amongst the many pleasures — expert colour consultation with Laura, thorough discussion with Paul as to exactly how much hair was going to end up on the floor, and how to get more bang for my highlighting buck — the seats at the sinks are massage chairs, and oh! if only I was sitting here now, blogging away, in a massage chair… I would be asleep and would never publish this a’tall.

Paul speaks quite movingly about how Temple Street have been there for Christian every step of the way, and it is really quite exceptional that his staff are donating their talents gratis. The vibe in the place was very buzzy the day I went in, and it wasn’t just from busy-ness: it was clear, from the warm reception through the great attention paid during my session, that the people that work there not only like working there, but they like each other, too.

There’s more info at zeba.ie — check out the raffle prizes! Hampers of haircare products! Jewellery! A Trocadero restaurant voucher! How much better can this actually get?

To make an appointment, ring Zeba on (01) 671 6444. Pictured: a gorgeous result.

Three Days Down The Country: The Winner and Undisputable Champion

I have given out about dry shampoos in the past, and I did find one that I liked, although it did claim to be a ‘dry cleansing spray’, which: what? I don’t know, is ‘dry shampoo’ too plebe-y a term?

I got a sample of Batiste Dry Shampoo Original from Aldi (€2.39) just before I left on the Big Easter Getaway Down The Country, and as I reckoned that the hair would not be undergoing its usual grooming regimen for a couple of days, well, why not give this a go?

I’d recommend getting to Aldi sharpish, because I may go and spend a whole buncha money buying this stuff up.

What I disliked about the other dry shampoos that I have tested is their penchant to turn the hair into a bale of hay. Sure, the oil at the roots is totally gone, but at the expense of manageability, much less looking like you’ve just stuck your whole hand in an electrical socket. I suppose if it had occurred to me at such times, I could have attempted a beehive, since my hair was all volumised and massive… but what if you just want your own hair, only less limp and lifeless?

Then, my friends, you turn to Batiste. I sprayed it on, finger-combed it through, let it dry for a second or two… then combed it out… and, holy wow, my hair felt light and clean — and it looked shiny.

I was absolutely not expecting the shine. Also, it was soft, which I would have thought was a fairy tale. Or an outright lie. But nope: shiny and soft hair from a dry shampoo, and I lived happily ever after for two days.

Two days! And the thing is! After the Big Easter Hill Walk, and then getting soaked, even though my hair was in a pony tail and I was wearing a hat and a hood {Irish rain, eh?} my hair got damp. And even though I dried it a bit by the fire, it didn’t really get all the way dry. So when I twisted it into a random knot on the top of head, for sleeping, I wasn’t expecting a good result the next day, Miracle of Batiste or no.

Well. I gave the hair a spray in the a.m. and it looked wavy and full and really, really good. I can’t believe I didn’t take a photo, for proof, but hand on heart, even after all its trials and tribulations, another spritz of Batiste made me look 100% Country Girl Chic.

This also comes in Tropical and Blush, neither of which would appeal to me {what does a blush smell like? Shame?} I found the Original version to be perfectly scented, which is ‘only just’. Funny, you’d think that given my fragrance fetish I’d want hair that wafted scent, but: no. I am perfectly delighted and satisfied with the original version, so I’ll leave those others  for the rest of yees.

Brows and Lashes: I Can Haz Cut ‘n’ Paste?

Yeesh, sorry if my followers are getting update notices — saw some typos I needed to fix, or else I wouldn’t be able to sleep this night!

It may just be that I am addicted to Photo Booth, but I wanted to update with the latest installment of HD Brows: simply put, the treatment/technique is fab, and I got mine refurbed last Thursday. That one is the bottom image, and I wish I was adept enough at P-shop to put those brows over those eyes {top} because the top brows are definitely furry, and blurry around the edges.

At one stage last week, I finally tried L’Oréal’s Superliner Gel Intenza(€14.99), of which I went on record as being to afraid to try — but I did it, and it is pretty fab. I found that if you didn’t get it right the first time round, it meant serious do-over, down to having to use eye make up removal product to clean the slate. as ever, my right eye was a doddle, and my my left eye, a debacle. It is kind of tacky on the finish, and it dries quickly, so I don’t know, maybe practice on the back of your hand?

The main problem I have with liner on the top edge of the lid is that I have almost no eyelid to speak of, so it just looks like I fecked a dark bit of whatever on my entire eyelid; so rather than getting something all eye-opening and dramatic, my lid merely looks dark. And then you skip right to the part between my lid line and the brow, which is called… What is that called? The upper lid? I can’t even think — does it have a name?

I think I am having a senior moment.

Also in use was a sample from MAC’s newest eye shadow, Extra Dimension Eyeshadow in Warm Thunder (€20.50). It received compliments, and lasted like nobody’s business. I found it as sticky to put on as the liner, but both lasted as long as I needed it to — that is, until I got home — so my advice would be to go lightly with this stuff, but go with authority and confidence.

Three Days Down the Country: High Maintenance, Wha’?

Template for a chill weekend up from Dublin: sitting around, drinking cups of tea in various people’s houses. Watching movies, drinking wine. Not expecting to wash much, to be honest. That’s not very high maintenance, is it now?

Er, so, then, why did I need all the stuff at left?

And all the makeup I brought and forgot to put in the photo — or it didn’t even occur to me to shoot it as it always goes with me anyway, like my keys, and my wallet.

So, what did I end up not using at all? The toothbrush>> JUST KIDDING. The Avéne cleanser, the Clinique Turnaround Concentrate sample, the Kiehl’s thing in the small blue tub.

Hmm. That’s not a terrible average, to be honest, and I had suspected that the cleanser wouldn’t get a look in.

I must highly recommend the Lush Silky Underwear Dusting Powder. I haven’t used dusting powder since I was a sprog, and this was great for, er, taking a bit of the pong off before the Big Easter Hill Walk through a bunch of woods, up and down boggy hills, to a lovely wee church on the side of the mountain. Not that there was anyone to offend, the gang of us were all in the same state, but I felt better in myself to have done even cursory grooming. I also lashed on some of the L’Oréal Nude Magique BB Cream, which is my absolutely new favourite thing, and swiped on some of my also-new-favourite-thing, Clinique’s Quickliner for Eyes Intense, because you never know who you might run into in the middle of a bog.*

Post-hike, with the last leg of it in bucketing down rain, I had a lovely bath and was sorry that I hadn’t brought along this egg from Lush, but my hostess had a gorgeously frothy bar of lavender soap that an Australian friend gifted her from Oz, and boy, would I like to know what that brand is.

Always on the job. But! The biggest asset to my three days with very little application of cleaning products will be revealed in the next post…

*No one.

Haiku Review: Carino Professional Miracle Oil from Aldi

Shake, shake, shake — doo doo
Doo doo DOO doo! Shake, shake, shake!
Shake your bottle. Shake

YOUR BOTTTTLE! It’s official: this is the world’s worst haiku! And I don’t even care, because it is making me laugh.

This is a glass bottle. I am thrilled by its glassness. It feels like the kind of bottle into which an old-fashioned apothecary might have poured a distillation of some healthful tincture. Or a snake-oil salesmen would have filled it with water and a splash of peppermint, claiming the mixture to be a cure all for everything from persistent cough to impotency.

Excuse me, I seem to be having a past life flashback. Or two.

The oil in this bottle has nothing to do with snakes, of course. It’s another in an ever expanding category of ‘things with argan oil in them.’ And as argan oil is so ‘now’, it can get pricey. At €3.99 it would really be good if this was good.

It’s good. And the thing is, I believe much of its goodness is down to the bottle. It’s not so easy to shake out, which ensured that I didn’t use too much. I hate having bad hair days, down to not knowing what was the optimum amount of a new styling product. I’ve had to figure out how to pump a half-pump of product, or how to drizzle jussst the right amount out of a container. This one was perfect from the go, because after a few shakes, you think Ah, sure, this is enough, and it is. And as it was teeny, tiny amount, I expect this to last me long enough to carry over into my next lifetime. Talk about excellent value!

Colour Me Impressed!

Okay, let me begin with a disclaimer: the nicks on the Sally Hansen Greige Gardens were in place before I even left the house. I had taken delivery of it just before I was heading to the horses; in a fit of inspiration, I lashed it on, and then proceeded to feck it up within minutes. The thing I am looking at here, and as regards the Catrice Cosmetics Ultimate Nail Lacquer in Karl Says That’s Trés Chic {whew, that’s mouthful}, is chipping and peeling.

No chipping and peeling a’tall! Even after a lesson of focused flat work, which means that we pretty much didn’t stop for the guts of an hour. This means that there was no sitting around waiting to jump, and that means that my hands were in use the whole time — so that means that the gloves-on-nails effect was in total play.

Time to up the ante, though, as the thumb and forefinger don’t curl around the reins, and therefore don’t suffer as much friction as the rest of them. I think there is a full manicure {or, since I’ll be doing it myself, a ‘manicure’} in my future this holy day weekend. And then we’ll see who is impressed!

{Ach, the state of my cuticles!}

Sally Hansen Complete Manicure retails for €8.95; Catrice Cosmetics Ultimate Nail Lacquer goes for €2.49