Tanning Twenty Twelve: Decadence Self Tan Mist

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Always ready to support a product that is Guaranteed Irish, it was with a paradoxical mix of optimism and trepidation that I cracked open Decadence Self Tan Mist (€14.99). Akin to the way that we really, really hoped the Boys in Green would make a good go of the Euros, we really, really hope that any new thing that comes out of Ireland will make a go of it, and then kind of sigh and shrug when it doesn’t — we had hopes, sure, but they weren’t all that high.

So, off came the plastic cap. I was exfoliated and ready to go. {I should have moisturised, I know, I know, but that’s a post for another day.} The container is a soft plastic, which allowed me to get a grip on it, which I counted to the good. I gave myself a cursory spray, even though I knew I wasn’t going to spray myself all over, because it got all over the place, and: nightmare. I have honestly given this technique a fair go in the past but here’s the thing: because I am worried about the spray tan all over the bath, I immediately start to clean it, and then get all sweaty, and then get all streaky.

Does this misting lark work for anyone? Am I just doin’ it rong? It’s a class thing, isn’t it? Because I’m a renter? Do all you home-owning, spray tanning-types have entire bathrooms devoted to the art, that you can just layer and layer in tan?

Anyway: gave it go, got it all over, proceeded to spray it on my handy applicator mitt, and it was joy to the world after that.

This is dark, and it goes on dark. This is good because you can see what you’re doing. It’s not great if you are super, super fair — at least, I don’t think it would be. It felt a little bold to me, and I am medium fair-ish.

I made sure that I got as much coverage as possible, so that I wouldn’t look too too dark, and I have to say, once it settled down, it gives an excellently warm and rich tan.

I put some on my face, which I am not sure I was meant to, not after it was too late and I did it anyway. I was far too, er, generous with the product, and I immediately scrubbed about half of it off. In future, I’ll be more delicate in my approach to that area.

Drying time: eh, only hits ‘okay’ on the Fab-U-Lometer, and actually inspired this post.

It has lasted for the guts of six days, it didn’t smell bad, and I have to say, this may be the best tan I’ve ever used on my legs which, even with fake tan, stubbornly refuse to look elegantly bronzed. They did with this one.

This is championship-level tanning. Olé, olé, olé!

***

Decadence Self Tan Mist is available in pharmacies nationwide.

What I Think About While Waiting for the Fake Tan to Dry

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… Is it twenty minutes yet?

… Being naked is not that big a deal, and especially now that I am bronzed all over. Well, mostly. I’m sure there’s that bit in the upper middle of my back that’s like the opposite of painting a target on your back. But yeah, so standing here with my arms held out so they don’t, what, glue themselves to my sides? I think I need to improve my technique. I go too fast, getting it over with, because — because of this stupid standing around part!

… Should I — nope, still a little tacky.

… So standing around naked, it’s dumb, just standing here.

… This colour, is it too dark?

… Is it — dammit. Five minutes, maybe, at the most.

…

… Oh, I did a crap job on my feet again.

… This colour, is it too orange?

… Is — dammit.

…

… Holy God, I can’t even believe I am doing this, just standing here. I should have brought the laptop in here and, I don’t know, it’s not like I can work or anything and —don’t move! The duvet cover! Not yours! The landlord’s! It’s white! Who buys white duvet covers? Rich people, that’s who! White stuff never comes clean properly in these little European machines! Even when I use those white sheet yokes that you put in with the wash! Crap, crap, did I — no, okay.

… Hate this.

… Is it — feck it, I don’t care.

Puts on loose black clothes; they feel a bit like they are sticking but could not be bothered at this stage. Fin.

Yay or Nay: Palettes

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I ask, because I just got a couple in the post from Dr Hauschka Skin Care.

Okay, first of all, I took that photo with my new Samsung WB85OF, which is a Smart camera in the way that phones are Smart: I snapped that pic and then emailed it to myself.

Back on point. To your left is Cool Breeze; on the your right is Warm Breeze. Both are part of the new Decorative Range from the good Dr, who is known for his skin care products. Everything in the line, from the foundations to the lipsticks, are made from organic ingredients, and they are perfect for sensitive skin.

I say yay because:
> I went to art college, and anything that comes in a clever case, saturated with colour, appeals to me on a visceral and sentimental level.
> Since I am off on a trip to the South of France next weekend, and will be flying with A Budget Airline, I am packing with an eye to the weighing counter. Having eyeshadow, two lippys, and an eyeliner in one thing, with a big honking mirror? Speaking of eyes, that’s one in that of the Budget Airline.

I say nay because:
> Eh, the whole lippy-in-the-palette thing never works for me. There’s no subtle way to touch up after you’ve eaten, or have been drinking. It’s awkward.
> I find the make up in palettes never seems to be as high a quality as the make up you get in separate packages.

Now, I received a Dr Hauschka Lipstick Novum in 07: Slow Mood, and I can safely say that this is going to be my summertime lipstick.

It’s a shimmery-coppery hue, and it feels light as a feather. I’ve applied some of the top left lipstick from the Cool Breeze palette, and have been sitting here writing away, and I have to say, like the Lipstick Novum, if feels really silky and light and nice. It feels like a lip balm, but it also has that slightly greater heft that a lipstick has: the perfect synthesis. Perhaps, then, the make up in this palette is as good as the individual servings on offer.

So, another yay, and the palettes are really compact … but still not convinced I am going to cart one or the other around with me.

***

The palettes are very limited edition and are priced at €60.
Lipstick Novum go for €16.50.

Small and Perfectly Formed: Max Colour Effect Mini Nail Polish

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My toes are not perfectly formed, although they are weirdly small. No: what I am talkin’ ’bout is Max Factor’s Max Colour Effect Mini Nail Polish (€4.99). See, the thing about nail varnish is — other than the fact that it has been wasted on my manky nails — I get tired of a colour almost immediately. Also, it’s all about mood, isn’t it? Like, I’m not going to feel orange or sparkly all the time, am I?

When these little gems came through the letterbox, I was abso delighted. They are so small, I can’t even read how many ounces they are. I don’t think there is even room on the label to include it! Here’s another wack photo of one of my feet:

Combination of colour swatch/relative size of the bottle, of which its body is not as big as my big toe. I really think this is perfection in nail varnish dispensing.

Shown here is Candy Blue, part of the Dalston (London) palette, which also includes Lollipop, Cactus Green, and Cool Jade. This trendy London neighbourhood is joined by Via Tortona (Milan), Marais (Paris) and Brooklyn (NY) (<— LOL: honestly, if you only knew some of the places I have lived in Brooklyn… hilarious.) (Also: not a neighbourhood, it’s a borough, which is much bigger.)

There are 18 shades in all, and they run the gamut from deep opaques like the blue I am sporting, to yummy pale-and-creamy hues, to sharp and sparkly metallics. That’s all I need — you?

Oh: just so you know, this colour is coming allllll the way off before we meet Italy on Monday. Because: duh.

Tanning Twenty Twelve: Lancôme Flash Bronzer Face Gel

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Well, I love this, and for so many reasons.

‘Fake tan smell’ is legendary, and the first thing people always ask about self tans: does it stink? To be honest, most self tanning products aren’t pong-y anymore, a sure sign that real people actual do work on making products. I mean, I always reckoned that the robots were behind the creation and development of all that stinky stuff, because no human woman would find them to be acceptable in any way shape or form. Or maybe all the scientists were men, and now they are not.

This does not stink. In fact, it smells really pretty. When you are applying stuff near the nasal area, this is a big plus.

The gel is light, and there’s a bit of tint, so you can see what you’re doing. It feels glorious, and it absorbs something rapid. I’ve used face tanning stuff that feels like a mask, or as if it is getting into your pores with the sole intention of making you break out, so of all its excellent points, this may be the number one.

Oh, and: it gives good colour. Really good. You can tell from the photos I took of my false eyelash escapades. In fact, I looked so brown that during last Friday’s deluge, I felt a little self-conscious. But I got over it.

Naturally, I use this on my neck as well, and have even gone all the way down to the cleavage, and my arms may be next. I’ve used the brand’s Flash Bronzer for Legs all over myself, and nothing untoward happened… I’ll let you know either way.

€29/£23/couldn’t find an American price, and frankly, still a bit wobbly from that terrible loss in the Euros.

Sad Face: What to Put on It

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IRELAND 1 — CROATIA 3  I wish I didn’t care about the footie so much. It is an odd thing, all the emotional energy that one can generate/expend, even when one is watching a match on one’s laptop, much less when one is in an actual stadium. It’s a tribal thing for sure, what with the drums and the face painting, and I love every single second of it — except when it makes me want to puke, and my heart is beating like it’s going to go into arrest, and I scream obscenities at the top of my lungs as though I had no class a’tall.

So I am sitting here looking at stuff on my desk and just don’t even know. My face is so sad, what could possible help cheer it up?

I usually find Lancôme skincare products err too much on the side of their signature scent, but today, it is just the ticket. And their Hydra Zen Neurocalm Anti-Stress Moisturising Cream would have come in handy last night. I’ll have to remember it for Thursday when we take on Spain.

Bliss is always good, as a concept and as a line of spa-quality product. My poor peepers have just benefited from Triple Oxygen Instant Energizing Eye Gel, which is cooling, soothing, and yes, energizing-with-a-z… but they can’t unsee that third Croation goal.

Better to be sad and brown than sad and pale, and American brand Image Skincare do a great Facial Bronzing Cream in their Body Spa category. It smells coconutty, which is a good thing, and if there is the tiniest whiff of fake-tan smell, you only notice it for a quick second. {Feel free to insert comment re: quick second half here.}

I am losing the will, to be honest… and I am usually really good about prices and stuff, but eh, just don’t have the energy.

One thing that always makes me happy is Snow Bunny: Carribbean in a Compact from Too Faced. It is the absolute best bronzer on the planet, and the golden brown, wedded with the white, pink, and fawn shimmer creates a youthful, healthy glow. I had to stock up when I was in the States, and you will have to order it online — unless someone knows a Irish stockist? Could I have some good news, pleassssse???

That’s all I got, friends. Really gutted, but ah, sure, you never know, and Spain and Italy — anything could happen, yeah?

YEAH!

The Proof is in the Pudding: Dr Lewinn’s Renunail Update

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There was that, on the left; there is now this, on the right.

In other idioms, a picture is a worth a thousand words.

I’ve given the nails a break from the Nail Strengthener for a week and a half now. I’ll begin that again on Saturday. I am loving the Nourishing Oil no end, and it is well worth living through the unattractive healing crisis in order to achieve such stunningly improved cuticles.

And if anyone else is curious, here’s the meaning of that colloquial, yet antiquated phrase.

Will continue to take it handy! { … }

Getting Over The Fear: False Eyelashes

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People think horseriding is dangerous {well… yeah, but if you pay attention and learn how to do it, it’s grand} but frankly, I am more afraid of false eyelashes than I am of 600kg animals.

I think the rain is getting to me this day, and I decided that there was no better way to get over the gloom than to play with some lashes. Continue reading →

Put Your Money Where Your, Uh, Face Is: Elemis Papaya Enzyme Peel

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So much going on here.

Elemis is celebrating the 10th anniversary of its Papaya Enzyme Peel, and doing it not only in style, but also with social awareness.

Artist Laura Oakes designed the new packaging, inspired by the key ingredients of the beloved Peel, which are papaya {didn’t see that one coming, didja?} and pineapple. It makes a vibrant and interesting change to the normally restrained and minimal Elemis packaging.

Both ingredients are sourced in Africa: in further celebratory style, Elemis are donating to SOCO™ (Socially Conscious) towards providing much needed vaccinations for African Children. One{ish} of your local currency — that is, €1.34/£1.07/$1.75 — covers the cost of a 5-in-1 Pentavalent vaccine. The company hope to vaccinate 50,000 children against diptheria, tetanus, whooping cough, hepatitis B, and Haemophilus influenze type B.

The bright {and dare I say, beautyfull} foliage theme picked up in the sleeve of the Revitalising Skincare Anniversary Collection. Included in it is the Peel, Soothing Apricot Toner, the excellent Melting Cleansing Gel, and Maximum Moisture Cream. It comes in a travel pack, and when I read about it I was like, Oh, okay, a travel pack, but then I received it in the post:

It is one of those foldy, hanging-up thingies! I haven’t had one of these in yonks, and I have forgotten how much I love them. Like, I would use this as my emergency pack in a crisis, like the ones that everyone in New York made up because of that hurricane last year? Only, mine would be full of stuff that was actually useless, unless it was a crisis of grooming.

But loooooook: more of Oakes’ beautiful pattern, zippered sections in which to put stuff, and the contents! Full-sized samples of product! This runs for €61/£45/$85, which seemed steep until I wrapped it in its entirety. Full-sized samples!

Call me crazy, but sort out mums and aunts and godmothers for Christmas now, with one of these. It is so substantial, and even if you spring for the Peel alone, you will be helping to make a substantial difference to the health of some African children.

Talk About Bright & Beautyfull! The Transit of Venus

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I’m fairly certain I’ve been consulting my horoscope since I learned to read, and if you yourself have not pored over Linda Goodman’s Love Signs, then I don’t even know what you are doing here, reading this blog. {It is never too late to rectify this situation! It is available for download on scribd.com! And OMG: you can read her other important work, Linda Goodman’s Sun Signs here, in its entirety, online!}

There’s all manner of information out there; I think that Mystic Mama has done a great job of distilling some key points. And while I tend to favour the Greek names of the ancient gods as opposed to the Romans, it must be clear that brightandbeautyfull is a celebration of Venus/Aphrodite, and that I am very focused on bringing out the goddess in myself via self-care, self-decoration, and self-tanning {LOL}.

Here are two sites via which to watch via web-cam: Exploratorium and SLOOH Space Camera. I have been saying ‘slooh’ to myself all morning. I suspect that we will be covered in clouds over here in Ireland, but I think I would be watching online regardless, because I am always afraid that even though I know I shouldn’t look at the sun, I will look at it anyway? Like, I’ve got some overwhelming, primal urge to look.

So: inside and online, which is certainly contrary to when the last double transit occurred in the late nineteenth century. Or was it? I dunno. Anyway, do something goddess-y, pretty, and fun later tonight, and even into the early morning!